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Thursday, May 8, 2014

QuadMama Fun

So, let me tell you about my last weekend...
Happy Quad Mamas!
L-R:  Amber S, Ashley M, Krista L, Amber B & Becky 
When I found out I was pregnant with QUADRUPLETS, I went through several stages of.. well.. denial.  And then panic.  And then fear.  And then joy.  And more fear.... but, thanks be to God, I connected very early on with other moms of multiples (MoMs) in person & on the internet in addition to the support of my family and friends.  Charged with the support of these MoMs, I then was invited to join a small, private online group that specifically consisted of MoMs with quadruplets and more!  that's right, an online community of quad, quint, & sextuplet mamas.  These amazing women are from all parts of the world and all walks of life.  Some have multiples with siblings and some do not.  Some ladies are newly pregnant and some have kids that are post-college age.  Some have healthy children, some have children with special needs, and some have gone through the heartache of losing one or more children far too soon.  There is such a variety in this special group, but one thing connects us all:  the sisterhood of being pregnant with and/or having higher-order-multiples (HOM).

This group of ladies NORMALIZED what I was going through as I progressed with my HOM pregnancy.  Although I was experiencing something completely new and scary, not only did God truly step in and calm my fears, but in a very tangible way these ladies also did that!  They were kind, gracious, truthful, supportive and caring.  They knew how to answer my questions better than anyone else could (even my doctor at times), because they had been exactly in my shoes!  They gave me hope and wisdom and let me know I was not alone.

Words simply cannot express how much these ladies, whom I had never met, mean to me.

While walking through this journey, there were a few other wide-eyed mamas-to-be that were exactly where I was, finding themselves pregnant with HOM's, excited, scared, baffled, overjoyed but worried.  I immediately connected with some of them.  We virtually held each others' hands as we navigated the crazy pregnancy, birth & NICU struggles.  We cheered & commiserated with each other, we prayed for each other, and navigated the early baby x 4 lifestyle together.  Amber B, Amber S, and Krista are bloggers too, so we followed each other's blogs and got to know each other in this way also.  As our friendships grew, we personally connected.  We would call, text, and write to each other.  I remember texting and talking to Amber & Krista with random questions like, "how much formula to water ratio are you putting in your pitcher?" and they would ask me random questions like what times my kids' naps were that day or how a new sippy cup was working out.  While I felt like I knew some of these ladies very closely and our friendships had become "personal", I have never met a one of them!!!  We all felt that needed to change.

I wish I could meet all the sweet ladies in our group.  Some day, I think it would be amazing to meet all of them in a huge, conference-center-style QM retreat!  In the meantime, those of us that already were talking regularly (as in, daily!) stared the dreaming planning of a get together.  We got husband approval (we all have the most amazing husbands!!!), and then figured out logistics.  A few ladies could not make it, but in the end we still had 6 quad moms.  Once the date & location was set up, we chatted several times a day.  We were like children anticipating Christmas!
First time seeing everyone "IRL".  L-R from top:  Amber S, Krista, Becky, Griselda; Bottom: Amber B, Ashley
Lunch in Austin, Texas.
Tally= 6 moms, 29 kids.  Bam.
The Plan was to share a condo in Gruene, Texas for a weekend (Thursday thru Sunday).  Amber B made all the arrangements for the condo.  Krista & I were to fly in, Ashley would pick us up at the airport, and the other three would carpool and meet us at the condo.  We had a very relaxed agenda.  We had some plans for shopping and eating, but nothing set in stone.
Andy was skeptical.  "What if you don't like them?  What if they are not what you expected?  What if someone is psycho?" were a few of his questions.  I pushed the questions aside, knowing in my gut we already had a strong friendship despite us never meeting "IRL" (in real life) and our connections being behind a screen.
Cheers!




When I first saw Ashley & Krista at the airport, we ran into each other's arms.  When we arrived at the condo, everyone hugged, & jumped up and down.  I must admit, it was a little surreal finally meeting these amazing women in person.  Amber B, being the sweetie she is, gave each of us a personalized box of beautiful cookies & a goodie bag when we met.  I am not kidding when I say these are the best sugar cookies I have ever had!  They are actually made by a friend of Amber's who has triplets.  Check out her Facebook link here!  We then started gabbing.  And gabbing.  And we did not shut up all weekend long.
No worries, Andy.  No worries.  In person, all we did was solidify and grow our friendships even stronger!!!


Hanging out!  Yes, I still love wearing my "Expecting Quadruplets" shirt with leggings.
It makes me smile but a girl commented on it when we went shopping one afternoon.
Girl:  "Oh my gosh, you are pregnant with quadruplets?!?!?"
Me:  (laugh)  "Oh, Heavens no!  The shirt is old.  They are almost 2 now."
That first night we did not go to bed until 3:30 am.  And then we were up at 8:30!!!  As tired as I was, when I heard voices in the kitchen in the morning I jumped out of bed, not wanting to waste any of this precious time together!  What followed was one of the biggest highlights for me: we sat around drinking Keurig coffee and lazily chatted the morning away.  No responsibilities.  No time crunch.  No agenda.  Just chatting and drinking coffee and talking to kindred spirits!
Unfortunately, Griselda (on R) started feeling sick Friday afternoon and decided to return home Friday night.  We were so bummed to see her go, but it was still great to get to know her in person!
The next day we went to Austin for lunch, a little shopping, and then went back to the condo to hang out.  Amber B & Krista made chicken fajitas & we relaxed as we watched a movie (seriously, I have not done this even with Andy in such a long time!).  On Saturday, we woke up our usual slow, gabbing, coffee-drinking way and then went for a walk & did some shopping in town.  We then went to the condo, ate lunch, and spent all afternoon by the pool.  We went to dinner at the Gristmill restaurant where I was introduced to Chicken Fried Steak.  It was delicious but next time I am definitely splitting this heavy meal with someone!  
Wine Tasting in Gruene!

This is amazing:  Amber and Krista are actually relaxing!!  And reading magazines!!!
Ashley & Amber reading magazines and sittin' pretty!
On a walk, we started taking pictures and asked a passerby to take a group picture.  She asked if we were there for a wedding, to which Krista replied, "No, we are all quad-moms on a vacation!".  We were surprised that Krista let the cat out of the bag, because we usually don't reveal that.  But the real shocker came when the lady gasped and told us she actually was a 52 year old surviving quadruplet herself!  She had 2 brothers that passed away shortly after birth and her other surviving (twin) brother had a daughter getting married in Gruene that weekend!
Now, what are the odds of that?!?   ;)



On Saturday night, not wanting our day to end, Krista, Amber S & I decided to do a "mini spa"- which consisted of a bath foot soak from Amber B's goody bag and sticky face gel- whoops, I mean cucumber face masks.  The face mask did NOT want to come off, but we all had a good laugh!  We finished our night eating cookie doh and chatting on our beds until late night.  I did NOT want the weekend to end!
Soaking our feet and wearing face masks.  This completely reminded me of my middle school sleepovers,  just without the late night ,"Who do you like?" sleeping bag discussions!



...And eating cookie doh & chatting in bed on the last night.  We didn't want the weekend to end!

Quad Moms or Second Grade School Girls?
We might be the former, but felt like the latter!
Epic.  Just Epic.  

Of course, it was great to return home and see my crew.  It was nice to hold Jenna & the babies, nice to be with Andy, nice to be home.  But this definitely will not be our last get together, it's only just begun!

Now when I talk about my fellow quad-mom friends, I can genuinely say they are near and dear to my heart.  I love these ladies!!!  I am so glad they are in my life.
It's good to have people walk the journey with you.

Hugs!

Becky




2 comments:

  1. I have read all of your blogs since you were pregnant. I found you through another quad mom blog. My husband thinks I am crazy. I have enjoyed reading all of your accounts of your weekend. I was excited for you all. I must say, that I dreamt of giving birth to quads last night, myself . Thanks for sharing your lives.

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  2. From a mother of two daughters - 5 years apart - I found myself wanting to be part of this group (and a little jealous, too!)

    God bless you beautiful women!

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